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It Won’t Always Be This Way…

Life has a tricky way of unleashing a series of unexpected blows and in some cases, it can completely stop you in your tracks. You get that unexpected phone call about a loved one dying in the middle of your normal routine and suddenly you are stuck in a repeat cycle. The repeat cycle would be the days after you find out news that has devastated you; you can find yourself going through the motions.

Only to look up and discover it’s a full month post-tragedy and you still feel like this incident just happened. Now you may panic because you start to feel like you might have missed something important, forgotten someone’s special day, or simply just not feel like you even lived your normal life post-incident/tragedy.

Is this you? Have you been there? If you answered yes, you aren’t alone. I am there with you. Our family suffered a tragic loss the week before Christmas 2021 and it has shocked our world to the core. I was stuck in the repeat cycle, I told my husband, Rueben, that this feels like one long day. Have you ever felt this way?

Grief is the act of releasing your loved ones once they leave this earth. It is not easy. It can be painful and unfortunately, it can change part of you. Something that I do is

welcome the tears and sit in the moments where memories flash across my mind like a Polaroid picture. I see my loved one at that moment and I don’t run away because, in reality, that’s all we have once someone passes away.

If you are still reading this, maybe you are here with me and you are grieving your dear loved one or ones. Here are 5 things to remember when processing grief:

1. Death is a part of life and we can’t stop it from happening.

2. Loved ones are the fabric of us, when they leave this earth keep a piece of them close to you.

3. Grief takes time; don’t rush through it.

4. No one can tell you how to grieve; only you know that.

5. You will feel different for a while and that’s ok.

Now that we have walked through things a little deeper, I want to leave you with 3 scriptures to cling to while you mourn the ones you love. These help me when I am overwhelmed and searching for peace while grieving.

1 Chronicles 16:11

Seek the LORD and His strength; seek His presence continually.

Psalms 32:7-8

You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.

Exodus 33:14

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.

May God’s love and peace surround you,

Tenia Hoskins


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